Scrambled eggs.
They’re one of the first things we attempt to make when learning to cook. It seems like they’d be the easiest of egg dishes to make. After all, how many fried eggs have you botched trying to flip them? The whites on sunny side up eggs never seem to settle. And quiche? That involves baking. (BAKING!)
So there we are–scrambled eggs. Hard to mess up, right?
Wrong. So easy. SO EASY to mess up. But also SO EASY to do right.
I am lucky enough to have a mother who always cooked amazing food, and taught me my way around the kitchen at a very early age. Breakfast has always been “my thing.” I was pretty damn good at it, even as young as high school.
But as I got slightly older, into my early twenties, more often than not, I would happen upon over-cooked, rubbery, even WATERY (how does one even evoke a water out of eggs?) scrambled eggs. It was terrifying.
I was a scrambled egg snob.
So, as I made myself some scrambled eggs for breakfast yesterday, I thought to myself–I really should educate more people on how to make proper scrambled eggs.
And so I got out my camera, and here we are.
Ingredients:
2 eggs (minimum–add more based on how many people you’re feeding!)
Sea salt (to your liking)
Pinch cayenne pepper
Chopped veggies. (I like zucchini and onion. Onion is a must!)
Olive oil or butter, to cook your veggies and eggs in.
Time Check:
Prep time: About 6 minutes, depending on how fast you like to chop your veggies.
Cook time: About 7-15 minutes, really, depending on how many eggs you’re making. The slower, the better here.
Eating time: 30 seconds. I give it 30 seconds until you’re licking your plate.
Instructions:
Prep the eggs:
Crack your eggs into a large bowl. (Make sure it’s larger than you think, it makes it much easier to whisk the heck out of them without worrying about spillage!)
Add your sea salt and a pinch of cayenne pepper.
(Note: If you’re never sure how much salt to add take this tip from Lynn (my mother)–pretend like you’re salting a fried egg on your plate. Do you usually do two shakes (or twists) per egg? Go ahead and do that!)
(You may notice I have sacrilegiously omitted milk or cream. You can certainly do that if you wish. It’s a free country, you know. But I like pure, simple scrambled eggs the best.)
Then, whisk your little heart out. Keep whisking. And whisking. An actual whisk is preferable here but a fork will do in a pinch.
After you can’t whisk no mo’–you’re ready. Why whisk so much? That’s how you really get the creaminess of the eggs. Set eggs aside.
Take whatever veggies you have in the fridge–I used zucchini and onion. But I am a firm believer in the fact that scrambled eggs ALWAYS need onion. Seriously, it makes a huge difference.
Get scramblin’:
In a non-stick pan (this is very important), over medium heat, drizzle some olive oil or butter in the pan. Some people think it’s strange that I cook eggs with olive oil, but I love the extra depth it gives them. They will also taste delicious in butter. Duh. It’s really your preference. You could also use both. (Why not?)
Sautee the veggies until nearly done. Your onions should be translucent.
Then turn the heat down. Way down. Turn it on down to low heat. Low and slow is the name of the game, here.
Then pour in your eggs. Let ’em sit there for a bit. Probably a minute or so, until you can start seeing the edges firm up. (They’ll turn a lighter color than the middle.) That’s how you know to start scramblin’.
Now, pay attention.
You want to use a heat-safe RUBBER spatula. Not that nasty metal kind, no. It must be rubber. Do not mess this up.
In a gentle, sweeping motion, start sweeping the spatula (scraping the bottom of the pan) up and down. Give the pan a shake to distribute the runny portion on top.
Your eggs should still be very runny.
Let em sit a bit–about 5-10 seconds in between sweeps, and then sweep your spatula again.
Continue this until they’re almost done, but still runny. Like a TINY notch below how done you’d like them to be. Depending on how many eggs you’re making, this could take between 7-15 minutes. But we can say 10 to meet in the middle. A good rule of thumb: two eggs should not take less than 7 minutes.
Seriously, cook them SLOW. I’m not joking. That’s the only way they get delicious and creamy.
Serve:
Then plate them. (They’ll continue to cook on the plate before you can spoon them into your mouth.)
Garnish with your favorites–perhaps chives, or shaved parmesan. (I didn’t have any in my fridge this time, but I would highly recommend either.) And toast, you definitely must serve atop toast.
